KISS’ Simmons Gets An Ass-whuppin’


Somebody’s trying to
make a point with the long-tongued devil.


By Fred Mills


This just in: 8 out of 10 BLURT readers, when asked in a
survey “Do you download KISS songs or purchase the band’s physical albums?”,
responded “Neither – I shoplift the CDs from Wal-Mart.” (The other two readers indicated that they do pay for the  albums, but that they get them from the “Hispanic dude selling bootleg CDRs out at the swap meet.”) It’s a stunning defeat
for the usually marketing-savvy hard rock band and further proof that the
buying public eventually grows weary of paying for the same old recycled
bullshit over and over.


In related news, Britain’s Guardian  is reporting this
morning that online attack group Anonymous successfully mounted an attack on
KISS bassist and professional douche Gene Simmons’ websites and and forced them offline
in the wake of comments made Tuesday by Simmons about the scourge of illegal
downloaders and file-sharers.


Simmons stated, “Make sure your brand is protected. Make sure there are
no incursions. Be litigious. Sue everybody. Take their homes, their cars. Don’t
let anybody cross that line. The music industry was asleep at the wheel, and
didn’t have the balls to sue every fresh-faced, freckle-faced college kid who
downloaded material. And so now we’re left with hundreds of thousands of people
without jobs. There’s no industry.”


In response, Anonymous, described as being “umbilically linked” to activist
online forum 4Chan, launched
denial-of-service attacks at the Simmons sites via a press release detailing
how its followers and correspondents were to coordinate the attacks (“we would
request that all Anonymous attackers using the hive mind… [set] #GeneSimmons as
the channel in your settings…”) – see the communiqué, below. There have been no
official responses yet from the Simmons camp.


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