plattencover” to you, my bilingual brethren… what does “I Want A Walmart Girl” or
“Fistful of Chicken” translate as?
By Fred Mills, Blurt Managing Editor
What do The Great Kat, Stryper, Scatterbrain, Manowar and
Lawnmower Deth have in common? Okay, sure, they all play heavy-ass music (some
would even call it “overwrought metal,” but for the sake of argument let’s just
call it “hard rock”). But our compatriots at Germany’s Spiegel Online have
apparently been scrutinizing more than just the artists’ sonic aesthetic, and
recently published a list of the 44 Most Embarrassing Album Sleeves.
Why 44 and not 50? Don’t ask us – we don’t speak German! Below
is a sampling, and yeah, they’re pretty awful. Fun fact: an editor of Blurt
once performed in a Manowar tribute band!
Some artists actually appear on the list more than once –
classical metallist The Great Kat actually has FOUR entries. Seriously, you
have to see this to believe it, and then to wonder the eternal, “What were they
thinking?” in terms of how the bands, their labels and their sleeve artists
came up with these hideous visual concepts. Another fun fact: the Scatterbrain
sleeve was done by the legendary Robert Williams, and it is alone among the 44
sleeves as actually qualifying as “art.”
You can view the entire rogues’ gallery here.