helps out on slow news day.
By Fred Mills
It’s probably not the smartest thing to do first thing in
the morning when you log on to check the headlines in the British media, but
there ya go: Kylie Minogue was quoted in this morning’s The Sun as saying she’s decided to become a lesbian.
Er, well, hold on there, all you hairy palmed fanboys.
Before you break out the vegetable oil, that’s not exactly what the singer said. Minogue, who in the article is
characterized as “lonely Kylie Minogue” who just can’t find a good man to give
her what she’s needin’, reflects on film actress Tallulah Bankhead, who was
bisexual but is very much deceased.
“I’d go gay for her,” Minogue is quoted. “She
was a fascinating and exotic woman. There was so much to admire about her. She
lived life to the full, maybe a little too fully. I can’t get a man so maybe I
should cross over.”
Well. That settles that. Quite. Glad we’re keeping our
quotes in context.
Funny how they are reporting this across the
pond. The headlines don’t even bother to accurately phrase the quote, reading,
variously, “I’m considering going gay,” “I might go gay,” and “wants to turn lesbian.”
A fourth headline bears the very tantalizing phrase “triggers 20-year
stampede,” but apparently that refers to some ticket sales, not a libido
This has been a public announcement – with disco balls.