This ain’t your
mother’s sweet little Partridge…
By Fred Mills
At BLURT we are all about giving musicians their due –
current, former, lapsed, dead, even those not even yet born. (Remember: a riff
begins at the moment of conception.)
Sometimes, though, it all gets a bit too much. You’ve kept
track of erstwhile Partridge Family member Danny Bonaduce, right? The radio
shows, the boxing matches, the strippers, the meltdowns… Well, the dude has
clearly, finally gone over the edge, as evidenced by what we came upon this
morning nosing around MySpace for band photos we could steal for the Blurt
“Hi, Danny Bonaduce here,” read the ad-box teaser. “Want to
earn and extra $1,700 – $7,900 from home this month?”
Why yes – yes, we do! Glad you asked, Dan!
The ad provides a web address for IncomeWithDanny.com (it doesn’t seem to be
working, however) and goes on to say, “If you’ve ever wished it was YOUR
TURN to escape “the rat race” and align with a respected company
that’s creating 5 & 6 figure income earners – every year – like clockwork,
then pay close attention to what you’re about to discover…”
Of course, you’ll have to fill out a webform and provide
your name, phone and address in order to click-through to the following page,
so at that point we decided that we’re happy enough being part of the rat race.
Truth be told, you’d have to be fucking nuts to go along with these sorts of schemes
– what, stuffing envelopes? Separating brown M&Ms from little piles?
Inseminating gerbils? Working spam bots?
And Bonaduce has lost his mind if he thinks anyone’s gonna
get sucked into his little celebrity black hole… Christ. Where’s Susan Dey when
we need her?
It was kinda cool
hearing that abrasive Bonaduce voice play while looking at the ad, however.