WHEN GHOST TREK ATTACKS!

An insidious new
comedy rocks hard, tapping the talents of punk, metal, electronic and
indie-rock bands.

     

BY RICHARD O’SULLIVAN

 

Imagine a cross between Kevin Smith’s Clerks, Syfy’s Ghost Hunters,
plus a little of Ricky Gervais’ The
Office
thrown in and you might come close to understanding the inspired
mental gang-bang that is Ghost Trek, the
raucous, uncensored, new indie sitcom disguised as a supernatural reality
series. Ghost Trek is sprung forth
from the twisted mind of rock journalist-turned-director (and BLURT
contributor) Michael Plumides, author of the music-biz memoir Kill the Music. With uber-witty dialog,
a hipper-than-hip cast, and a sonically disemboweling soundtrack, Ghost Trek follows the exploits of the
Paranormal Underworld Detective Society (PUDS) as they zig-zag across the
nation investigating things that go booga-booga in the night between bitching
girlfriends, barking bosses, tanning beds, and bong hits – all the while
risking life and limb capturing the undead on video.

 

Helmed by “handsome chiropractor-turned-spook-investigator”
Dr. Zeke Wallace (played by Michael Melendez – not to be confused with Ghost Adventures head honcho Zak Bagans
but easily as two dimensional), the PUDS team contains some very familiar faces
to popular culture aficionados, including reality stars Jonny Fairplay and
Mikey Bortone (CBS’ Survivor),  pro-wrestling cult heroes Scott “Colt
Cabana” Colton and Glenn “Disco Inferno” Gilbertti (WWE and WCW respectively), Maxim covergirl Gia Allemand (The Bachelor),
North Carolina female rock vocalist (for Dreamkiller) and scream queen (Mortuary) Christy Johnson, and indie
horror’s comic genius Brett Gentile (Cold
Storage
). Go here to see the IMDB.com entry for Ghost Trek.

 

In the pilot episode, entitled “The Kinsey Report” young
zenith Addy Miller (pictured above, with director Plumides, and now an instant
horror legend for her portrayal of a child zombie on AMC’s The Walking Dead) co-stars as a murdered prepubescent beauty queen
named Tyler Rae Kinsey (strangled adorably with a jump rope), calling out from
the ether somewhere in the thick Colorado air. Faster than you can say
“Holy Jon Benet, Batman!”, PUDS spring into action in an attempt to
catch Tyler Rae on camera – hopefully within budget and with just the proper
amount of unprofessional dicking around. 
But hard times have befallen all those who have come in contact with the
Kinsey case. And Zeke’s girlfriend/producer just found out he’s been getting
some mugambo from one of Charlie Sheen’s girls behind her back. Will she get
him shit-canned? Will the PUDS be cursed? 
We will see.

 

Trailer for “The
Kinsey Report”:

 

 

Like Law & Order,
Plumides’ chose material torn from yesteryear’s headlines. But unlike Law & Order, it’s a headline that is
then proverbially tied face down on a table and forcibly fisted with someone
losing their wristwatch.  Nods to Scooby Doo, The Young Ones, and Entourage, “The Kinsey Report” deserves every bit of the tag line “Paranormal research
with an emphasis on bad taste” while also retaining the reality show feel in an
obnoxious Bad Girls Club kinda way
enough to make “The Donald” proud. Plumides has another eleven episodes in
development as well as a feature film; some are based on real cases, but not
all. But they are all chocked full of pop-culture references ranging from Kolchak: The Night Stalker to Tombstone, and definitely honed to appeal to the Family Guy crowd.

 

With politically incorrect, balls-to-the-chin humor combined
with hilarious ghost hunting fubar underscored by the pitch-perfect special
effects makeup of two-time Emmy winner Dean Jones and brother Starr (Star
Trek: Deep Space Nine, Star Trek: Generations
), Ghost Trek brings the bang for the indie buck. And it should
probably come as no surprise that the soundtrack doesn’t exactly share a lot of
crossover tunes with this week’s episode of Grey’s
Anatomy

 

Plumides, who has noted that he intends his project to be
“the Spinal Tap of paranormal reality TV” and maintains an uber-lively
blog, “The Decline of Southern Civilization,” detailing his work on the film
and sundry other matters, confirms that the soundtrack is unique, saying, “I wanted the score to be ominous, creepy, but a little silly. We
employed the work of Hit Music, Inc. (Alan Grossman and Jimm Mosher) for
that.  But I also wanted Ghost Trek to be highlighted with indie
bands that have a familiar ring. So, I reached out to a few folks, some I knew
and some I didn’t. They each contributed one song a piece. We signed all the
synchronization agreements and placed the songs exactly where they needed to
be. I did the licensing and Rob Filion, my co-director, supervised the music
edit. All the bands are great, and have a distinct sound of their own. And the
songs are appropriate for each scene theme.”

 

Rather than sensitive bleeding angst from the latest Sarah
McLachlan wannabe, we get an opening theme entitled, appropriately enough,
“Haunt Me,” from the take-no-prisoners North Carolina goth- electronica
outfit Angels on Acid, a band that
somehow manages to blend the energy of old school Trent Reznor with the
ethereal goodness of Joy Division.

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5OfeL2W6zI&feature=autofb)

 

 Bringing forth a decidedly anti-hero anthem (pun
intended) called “Kill the Cheerleader (Save the World)” are South
Carolina’s ruling punk/metal hybrid gods, Isabelle’s
Gift
(coming off their KISS opener in the Carolinas last October), who
deliver every riff and line as though they’re laying it at an altar for either
Ozzy Osbourne or Mike Ness, whomever the hell is hungry that day.

(http://www.isabellesgift.us/the_free_download)

 

Bonging out to metal seems to be the flavor of the
month.  The next song in the pilot is a
nervous and foreboding ditty called “The Hunt,” by Brooklyn band (and
current Combichrist opener) Star Killer, with a Nitzer Ebb (or Gravity Kills, take your pick) meets Jane’s Addiction
slant.  Fronted by Jasin Cadic, co-writer of the film, The Perfect Age of Rock-n-Roll (Kevin
Zegers, Jason Ritter, Peter Fonda – due to be released later this summer), Star
Killer displays a love of Manson-Korn-esque era rock that will knock your dick
in the dirt.

(http://www.reverbnation.com/starkillernyc)

 

And rounding out the eclectic soundtrack is “Wicked
World” by the folk/rock/cabaret carnage carnival known as Hellblinki, whose music is reminiscent
of a “Squirrel Nut Zippers meets Gogol Bordello – cum -Tom Waits chained up in
the Avett Brothers’ basement” sound is essentially the musical compendium to
all things Ghost Trek, creating a
universe that is at once off-kilter and yet more sane than anything on the
evening news.

(http://www.hellblinki.com/)

 

***

 

With the pilot episode in the can, Ghost Trek is currently in negotiations to blow its unique form of
ectoplasm on an HD screen near you. Ghost
Trek: The Kinsey Report
has its first public screening at ConCarolinas 2011
Sci-Fi Convention in Charlotte, NC on Saturday, June 4th

 

For more information: www.concarolinas.org. Also find the Ghost Trek Facebook
fan page here – tons of awesome photos, and more: https://www.facebook.com/GhostTrekTV

 

 

Richard O’Sullivan is a writer-turned-filmmaker whose work with NBC’s
“The More You Know” single-handedly kept a generation off crack
cocaine.

 

 

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