Britain’s Shockwaves Awards: No Shocks

 

Britain’s
Shockwaves Awards Fail to Shock

2-26-09

 

Hey, quit raggin’ on
the Jonas Brothers, ya Meanies!

 

By Fred Mills

 

Though Barack Obama took Hero of the Year honors and his
predecessor George W. Bush was handed the Villain of the Year trophy, last
night’s Shockwaves NME Awards ultimately held no real surprises other than the
fact that the NME & Co. bothered
to make a half-ass reference to world politics. Elsewhere, it was business as
usual, with many of the usual suspects getting nods, including the Cure (the
annual Godlike Genius award), Oasis for Best British Band, the Killers for Best
International Band and Pete Doherty (pictured) for Best Solo Artist.

 

In addition to the Killers, some fairly unoriginal thinking
was on display when it came to the Brits’ choice du jour for Americans: Kings
Of Leon won Best Album, and MGMT nabbed Best New Band and Best Track. Not to
get catty or anything, but if the Killers, the Kings and MGMT are the best acts
we can send across the pond, maybe it’s time to concede that the domestic music
industry is in fact in the toilet and finished as many have been predicting for
some time. (Raise your hand if you can remember a time when U.S. bands like
the Long Ryders and Mudhoney were making the cover of the NME.)

 

The Jonas Brothers, naturally, were hailed as Worst Band and
Worst Album, clearly a reactionary-vote-by-design. This only goes to prove that
people who live in glass houses might should consider not throwing stones: the
UK track record of serving up so-called prefab teen pop stars with critical
cred isn’t particularly good, folks, so watch who you’re bashing.

 

 

 

Winners List:

 

Godlike
Genius: The Cure

Best British Band: Oasis supported
by Shockwaves
Best Internationsl Band:
The Killers
supported by 4music
Best Solo Artist: Pete
Doherty

Best New Band: MGMT supported
by Bench
Best Live Band: Muse supported
by Red Stripe
Best Album: Kings Of Leon
‘Only By The Night’
supported by HMV
Best Track: MGMT ‘Time To Pretend’ supported by NME Radio
Best Video:
Last Shadow Puppets ‘My Mistakes Were Made For You’
supported by NME
TV

Best Live Event:
Glastonbury 2008

Best TV: ‘The Mighty
Boosh’

Phillip Hall Radar Award:
The Big Pink

Best Dancefloor Filler:
Dizzee Rascal featuring Calvin Harris and Chrome – ‘Dance Wiv Me’

Best DVD: Arctic Monkeys
– ‘Live At The Apollo’

Best Band Blog: Oasis’ Noel
Gallagher

Best Venue: London
Astoria

Best Album Artwork Muse ‘HAARP’
Hero Of The Year: Barack
Obama

Villain Of The Year: George
W Bush

Best Dressed: Alexa Chung
Worst Dressed: Amy
Winehouse

Worst Album: The Jonas
Brothers – ‘A Little Bit Longer’

Worst Band: the Jonas
Brothers

Sexiest Male: Muse’s Matt Bellamy
Sexiest Female: Paramore’s
Hayley Williams

Best Website: YouTube

 

 

 

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